Serving Clients Across Texas

Is "Conscious Uncoupling" Really Possible?

Thanks to Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin, “Conscious Uncoupling” has been front and center in the headlines. I discussed this trending phrase in my blog last week.

Psychotherapist Katherine Woodward Thomas, the creator of the concept “conscious uncoupling,” describes it as “a break up that is characterized by good will, generosity and respect and a process that leaves both parties feeling valued and appreciated for what they shared. It is a process where two people are striving to minimize the damage that they do to themselves and their children.”

In my experience, more often than not, there is one person who wants out of a marriage while the other spouse wants nothing more than to remain married. When this happens, two people are rarely ever on the same page as to the divorce. Texas is a “no fault” divorce state. This means for a divorce in Texas, one spouse wanting out of the marriage is enough to allow a divorce to take place. A person does not have to prove they were abandoned or any other reason why they want a divorce. A simple “I don’t want to be married anymore” will suffice.

How likely is it a couple will have a “conscious uncoupling?” The Huffington Post discussed the pitfalls of divorce and the issues present themselves during the divorce process that prohibit or hinder a “conscious uncoupling.” In theory a “conscious uncoupling” is a wonderful goal for a couple to strive for, while going through the divorce process. Realistically, there are many painful and stressful issues that arise during a divorce process such as the division of assets and debts, child support and custody. How a couple handles these situations requires compassion, understanding, and a great deal of communication.